


No One Knocks on The Defiant

by StarTravel



Series: Defiance Through Tenderness [7]
Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Introspection, POV Julian Bashir
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-28
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-09-01 23:09:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16774789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarTravel/pseuds/StarTravel
Summary: Julian’s friends find out about his sharing a bed with Garak. This only makes things more confusing for Julian than they already were, but at least he (kind of) knows how he feels. Probably.





	No One Knocks on The Defiant

Julian wakes up to a warm weight across his back and the chime of his door opening, bright lights pouring into the room and making him wince slightly. He’s barely slept today and he’d hoped it would take a bit longer for someone to come for him. It takes a few seconds for him to realize the tall, laughing shape in the doorway isn’t some kind of vision, but instead a wide-eyed Jadzia. “Oh, Julian! I didn’t mean to interrupt!”

Julian blinks owlishly, tilting his head a bit in confusion. Then a familiar warm chuckle fills the air, sliding over him in a way he normally finds reassuring. Right, he’s currently not only sharing a bed with Garak, but the other man has his arms wrapped around his waist and his chin pressed up against his shoulder. That probably looks like more than it is, or at least more than Julian thinks it is. “No, you’re not interrupting anything! We were just - it’s easier to sleep like this, because of the warmth and the weight and - it’s not or-”

“Eloquently expressed, my dear.” Garak’s voice is barely more than a whisper, hair brushing Julian’s shoulder blade as he leans up. Julian glances back just in time to see Garak giving Jadzia a shark-like smile, eyes gleaming like a cat who’s caught several dozen canaries. Julian lets out a low groan, because he doesn’t have time to deal with whatever conversations this little discovery yields.

“Garak, Sisko needs you too. I’ll see you on the bridge, boys.” Jadzia smirks lazily over at them, one hand on her hip as she gives them one final once over. Julian swallows the urge to pull away from where Garak’s still lying half on top of him, the thickly corded muscles and soft scales pressing into his chest. Julian watches Jadzia saunter out of the doorway, the white gleaming doors sliding together after a beat.

“You haven’t told your friends about us yet, my dear Julian?” Garak asks with a touch of hurt that could be authentic or mocking or both. Garak pulls away from Julian, who can’t stop the reluctant sigh that slips from his lips when the other man’s arms are no longer wrapped around him.

“And what exactly would I tell them, my darling Elim?” Julian asks with undisguised annoyance, letting out a low huff as he grabs his boots from under their bed. He doesn’t see why _he_ has to be the one to define their relationship when he’s the one who chased after Garak like a puppy for three and a half years. He doesn’t bother to change into his pajamas half the time anymore, too many medical emergencies happening at all hours for him not to always be partially in uniform. He knows it bothers Garak, who insists the material is too rough and stiff for a _good_ night’s sleep. Julian can’t really disagree.

“Whatever you think is best, dear.” Garak calls as he strides to the door, smile placid and far too friendly for this early in the day. Julian makes an affronted noise in the back of his throat, but follows Garak down to the bridge without further comment. Julian’s not in the mood for genuine bickering, not while they’re stuck on this ship.

Sisko immediately grabs Garak by the shoulder and leads him to the other side of the bridge, whispers and tight looks Julian isn’t sure he wants to understand passing between them. Julian doesn’t have time to give it much thought, Jadzia suddenly pulling him over towards where she and Miles sit in front of the comms. “Well, since Garak’s busy, how about we talk about what’s actually going on?”

“I have no idea what you mean.” Julian’s voice is clipped as he slides into the chair next to Jadzia, gaze locked onto the buttons in front of him. He can feel Jadzia staring at him, gaze narrowed and mouth curving back into that same smirk she had in his doorway a few minutes ago. After a moment Miles joins in, furrowing his brow as he furtively glances between them. Wonderful. “What?”

Jadzia gives him a flat look, sliding one palm out on the console towards him. Miles raises an eyebrow, gaze more firmly on him than Jadzia now. “Julian, you and Garak are sharing a bed.”

“You’ve started that up again?” Miles cried as he runs his hand across his face almost in slow motion, a frustrated groan slipping from his lips. Jadzia elbows him not at all subtly, scrunching her nose at him before turning back to Julian with an apologetic grin. Julian swallows down several curse words as he throws his hands up, shaking his head back and forth rapidly.

“There was nothing up to begin with!” Julian corrects them in a hushed whisper, leaning in as he glances over at where Garak is animatedly telling an annoyed Sisko something. He can’t quite stop the rush of fondness that comes over him, the hint of a smile that makes Miles raise a disbelieving eyebrow at him. “And nothing’s going on, Garak just needs the warmth and I like to be weighed down when I’m sleeping, so we found an arrangement that worked for both of us.”

“I could’ve gotten you a weighted blanket, you know.” Miles mutters under his breath, shaking his head at him with more amusement in his gaze than Julian would’ve expected.

“Miles.” Jadzia’s voice has a hint of a warning in it, her lips pursed as she crosses her arms and gives the other man a short look. Jadzia leans over to press her right hand to his shoulder, smile growing more genuine as a light flush starts to spread up Julian’s neck. Her gaze is so sincerely happy for him that it makes Julian want things he can’t have, shouldn’t have. “Congratulations, Julian. I’ve always been rooting for the two of you.”

“Hey, if you’re happy, I’m happy for you.” Miles says gruffly as he reaches out to grab his other side almost roughly, hands spreading out wide against his bony shoulder. Miles’ gaze is different now, warmer but also with a steel behind it he normally reserves for his children. Julian feels both touched and insulted to be included in it, sucking in a deep breath as Miles speaks. “Just be careful, all right?”

Julian presses a hand against his forehead, pinching the skin in the center for a few seconds as he takes several measured breaths. He’s happy his two closest friends are supportive of him and Garak’s romance, except that there isn’t one to support in the first place. “Garak would never hurt me - but there’s nothing to be careful about, we’re not - it’s not -“

“Julian?” Jadzia’s voice is softer this time, a hint of concern as she leans in to squeeze his shoulder softly. Her blue eyes are filled with a sudden contriteness, as though she just realized things might not be what she thought. Or maybe they are. God knows _Julian_ has no idea.

“Look, I don’t know _what_ it is yet or how long it will last. But Garak is - we’re connected, at least for right now.” Julian tries to explain this peculiar bond between them that’s always been there, from the moment Garak places his hands on Julian’s shoulders like they’d always been there, but has recently gone from fragile to something that feels almost durable, if they could just be _direct_ about what it even _is_.

“Julian, how do you feel about Garak?” Jadzia asks as she pulls her hand back, some of the teasing mirth from before going out of her eyes. Julian wrings his hand out, gaze shooting up to the ceiling as he swallows tightly and makes a wounded sound that draws everyone’s eyes -Garak’s sharp, penetrating ones included - to him. Today just keeps getting better and better.

He closes his eyes for a few seconds as he considers the question, at once both simple and almost impossible to answer. He loves Garak, has loved him for years. But it’s not the same way he loves Miles, deep and platonic but with little need for touch, or the more … physically focused affairs of his youth.

No, this love is something different, warm and all-encompassing and frankly terrifying in a way Julian refuses to deal with. “Jadzia, we both know that self-reflection isn’t one of my strong suits.”

“Just be careful,” Miles warns him in a more firm voice this time, glancing warily between him and Garak. Miles ruffles his hair idly before making his way across the bridge. Julian wonders for the first time if Miles wants to protect him more from Garak or from his own self-destructive tendencies, if loving Garak _is_ something of a self-destructive tendency.

But then Garak smiles at him, delicate and knowing from across the room, just the slightest uptick of his lips, and Julian knows this is a reprieve.


End file.
